Friday, October 4, 2013

Marriage in the Home

When I was a senior in high school my parents started having serious marital problems.
It would be another couple of years before the officially divorced, but that was a tough year.
Yes, the divorce itself was very painful, but I remember that year being full of so much heart ache.

Watching my parents essentially hate each other was really hard.
At that point in my life, I promised myself that I would never put my children through that kind of pain.

Now that I'm a parent, I want our kids to see that mommy and daddy love each other very much.
I want my kids to see that we put our marriage first even above them!
Yes, you heard me right, I want my kids to know that our marriage is more important than them.

That might sound crazy to several people and before you go accusing me of not loving my kids, let me explain.
My church back home has a very famous saying.  God is your #1 and your spouse is your #2.  You have to keep your #1 relationship strong in order to have a strong #2 relationship.  Well, I'd like to take that a step further and say that if you don't have a strong #1 AND #2, the home you provide for your kids will not be the best it can be.

In my opinion, the best gift you can give your children is a strong loving home.  (Hints why I'm writing this series)  And having a secure, loving (not necessarily problem-free) marriage is the first step in getting that home.

You see, my parents hadn't divorced but their marriage had not been a first priority for awhile.
After several years, it started to crack and crumble and everyone felt it.
It was that year that our home started to crack and crumble.

While everyone needs a solid relationship with the Lord (that's another post), the home needs a solid marriage from the parents to thrive.

By the end of the day, I'm exhausted.  I'm usually covered in spit up, tired from cooking and cleaning and keeping whining and crying at bay.
It's so easy to throw the kids at my husband and go hide away the rest of the evening.
I challenge us women, to spend our evenings really being with our husbands.
I challenge us to keep our marriage the first priority.  Pour into that relationship even when you don't feel like it.
Passionately love your man and remember why you fell in love with him in the first place.
Schedule date nights.  Even if it's just at home after the kids are in bed.
Pray for your spouse and your marriage.

Keep your marriage first.
Your home WILL thrive with such a strong foundation.


  1. I absolutely love this! I don't have kids yet but I would completely agree. If your number 1 and number 2 relationships aren't a solid foundation, it makes no sense to build upon it.

  2. You nailed it! Could not agree more.

    1. BTW forgot to say, Date nights are essential! Or date day. It's that alone time without the children where you can give each other the attention we need. Many of our date nights are at home when our boys stay with my parents. :)


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