Saturday, October 6, 2012
That Little Voice
I have this voice, this dang voice, that never stops.
It always makes me second guess EVERYTHING.
Yesterday this voice was at an all time high!
Let's just say Little Miss and I got into a power struggle over her watching Disney Junior.
She is ALMOST as stubborn as her mama, and this lasted quite awhile.
She screamed and cried and I let her, but I didn't give in.
After she was done, she came down and gave me a hug and said she wanted to rock.
And rock we did.
As I held her and hugged her tight, in crept this lovely visitor that I have become a little to familiar with.... "That Little Voice"....
Should I have given in?
I can't believe you let your child cry?
Should I have spanked her for the fit?
And on and on the self doubt went.
We proceeded to have a great rest of the night, and after she went to bed, I called in back up.
Oh goodness, I have no idea what I would do without my mom!!!!
She talked me through it, and then she said something that will forever stick with me, and Lord knows I will tell my Little Miss when she is older.
She told me "that little voice is what makes you a good parent", she then went on to explain that if we didn't doubt ourselves then we'd think we'd have it all figured out.
If we have it all figured out then we wouldn't give and be open to changing our ways for the better.
How is it that my dear mama always knows what to say to me?
I instantly felt better, and told her she was the smartest woman I know.
I kept thinking on this and it's so true.
I hate that little voice.
I hate that it makes me doubt myself.
But without that voice, I wouldn't go to God and ask Him for wisdom with my parenting.
I would be a little to "big for my britches"and think I have it all figured out.
Well I don't. And now I don't think I want to.
One day at a time, seeking His will as I go.
Parenting a toddler in the midst of the terrible two's is kicking my butt.
But at least I know "That Little Voice" doesn't make me a bad parent, but in fact, it makes me a better one.
Thank you, Mama, for your wise words!